I’ve never professed to know anything about what makes food “good”. I mean, sweet chilli sauce is one of my favourite condiments for gods sake and I know that saying blogging that out loud has already condemned me to the bland and empty depths of foodie hell, to spend eternity in a damp pit of “nasty” condiments like sweet chilli, mayonnaise and BBQ sauce.

Oh my, what a lovely hell.

And we all know that I love burgers. Be it Byron’s monstrosity of a big fat burger, or Grand Union’s tall, lanky version, my heart has always belonged to the simple, unpretentious beef burger, and one place that has never, nudda, not once failed to sate my burger appetite is the aptly named Ultimate Burger.

I can already see the masses cringe at my crude and unsophisticated palate. I’m sure my blasphemous claim is on par with liking McDonalds, but hey you know what? I like them too, so go on, send me into the pit of sweet chilli sauce.

I dare you.

So Boxing Day ~ Panu and I had been hanging out to watch James Cameron’s Avatar for like forever, and the excruciating wait was finally over. We were craving burgers for dinner and to be honest, our first choice had been Byron’s new Soho haunt but they were closed so that’s for another day and another blog post.

But The Ultimate Burger, they were open and did I not tell you? They’ve never let me down, not even on Boxing Day.

We headed in and ordered our usual ~ a BBQ beef burger each, a side of fries and Panu (who is guaranteed a place by my side in sweet tooth glutton heaven hell) orders his standard vanilla shake which I am not even kidding here, is like they blended up a litre of ice cream and nothing else. It is so thick I wouldn’t even call it a drink, it’s dessert, really, but you can kid yourself and call it a drink, and have dessert again after. Pure genius.

The burgers, in my very humble opinion, are nothing short of phenomenal. Served with soft, sesame seeded brioche buns, the beef patty oozes cheese from within and is accompanied by a simple tomato slice, a ring of salad onion and a lettuce leaf.

Our particular burgers, the BBQ beef burger, is made even more delectable with a generous dollop of BBQ sauce (hello condiment hell) and as if that wasn’t enough, a dash of sweet onion relish.

I mean oh my God. Is that not perfection in a burger?

Why yes, yes it is.

The fries are also crispy good ~ just the way I like ’em. I love skinny, over cooked fries and for those street vendors who cook them twice to keep them warm, goddamn that double cooked, doubly oily, doubly crispy fries are just up my alley.

I don’t actually think The Ultimate Burger cooks their fries twice. But who knows, really. Regardless, they look and taste like the crunchy golden potato bits that fill my belly and cold winter hands with warm lovin’ and though their burgers are what I hit them up for first, having my choice of fries really doesn’t go astray either.

image courtesy of www.avatarmovie.com

Dinner in our well rounded bellies, it was time for Avatar. Three hours of unadulterated 3D action and when it was over, I was truly speechless. If that doesn’t tell you what a profoundly astonishing movie it is, I don’t know what will because me? Speechless? Honey, enjoy it because it don’t happen often.

In its magical world and magical ways, Avatar was entertaining to the nth degree, but beyond that it told tales of imperialism, biodiversity, humanity (or there lack of) and even though I really am not that green, environmentalism.

I think what hit home for me was that oh my god, James Cameron has nailed human behaviour down to a tee. We rape and pillage and kill our Earth like there’s no tomorrow (and don’t do squat about it at annual climate change conferences *ahem* Cop15) and when our planet has no more left to give what do we do?

We haul our greedy asses over to the next planet (if we are so lucky to find one with resources) and start destroying them. It is so true and this is what will happen when we finally drain our Earth of fossil fuels. I can almost guarantee it and Mr Cameron, he knows it.

Woah. Time out.

Did I just go all green on y’all there? Sorry, I apologise, now back to beef.

The Ultimate Burger. BBQ beef burger. It’s the ultimate. No joke. Go.

The Ultimate Burger
98 Tottenham Court Road
Fitzrovia, W1T 4TR
0207 436 5355

Ultimate Burger on Urbanspoon

15 Thoughts on “James Cameron’s Avatar: an ultimate date, the ultimate movie, The Ultimate Burger

  1. Lovely post. I’m a fan of sweet chilli sauce too – I didn’t realise it was anything to be ashamed of!

  2. Sadly, I was once berated on Twitter for loving sweet chilli sauce but don’t you worry, it hasn’t stopped me from consuming as much as I can, however I can 🙂

  3. The BBQ beef burger looked so scrumptious!! Everyone is pestering me to watch Avatar.. so I guess I really have to this weekend!

  4. Erm, slightly out of context. I said I hated the use of sweet chilli sauce as a cooking ingredient, not a condiment – those recipes that say “take one chicken breast, smother in sweet chilli sauce, bake” etc. Eurgh.

  5. chelley: the burger was great and Avatar was astonishing – you really should see it, and make sure you see it in 3D!

    Lizzie: I do remember that, but I wasn’t talking about you in this post ~ I get paid out all the time for dousing my food with sweet chilli sauce and ketchup (not at the same time.. well not always ;)) and sadly, I do use it in cooking sometimes *gasp*

  6. It was me. Sweet chilli sauce is proper rank.

  7. I’m not sure what sweet chili sauce is. It must be an English thing. I also don’t know what “proper rank” means. It sounds like praise but I gather, from context alone, that this is a pejorative, even though both the word “proper” and the word “rank” seem good. Strange.

    Anyhows, I used to love the Carl’s Jr. Western Bacon cheeseburger which is simply wrong so I’m sure I’d love the Ultimate Burger too. But the irony of seeing a green movie and then eating beef which has been pointed to as the most environmentally disastrous food choice has not escaped me. Catty, you are one cool customer.

  8. tehbus: yeah. whatever 😉

    yutjangsah: you don’t know what sweet chilli sauce is? Is this another thing I need to bring for you to advance your food edumacation?? Anyways, it’s like uh, a sweet. chilli. sauce. and I love the stuff in case you can’t tell. And you’re right, “proper rank” makes it sound like the Commander in Chief of ALL condiments, so it rocks!

    ps. will be heading to In’n’Out burger in LA 🙂 come with!

  9. Honey, there’s never any shame in condiments. It’s composed chemically to make us crave it and can’t live without it. <3

  10. Cat! Hubby and I did exactly the same thing. We went to get our burger fix (at Grill’d, is it in London? Their bird and brie burger is SO good), then went to watch Avatar! I loved it so much that I’m making Celz go tomorrow and I’m going to go with her. Have a great 2010 dearie! xoxo
    ps I remember you went to LA and NY last year? Any recommendations? (tourist and food)..but we will have a baby in tow..

  11. Melody Fury: I think it worked. I LOVE my condiments.

    Di: I haven’t heard of Grill’d but it sounds great already ~ bird and brie? LOL, I’d eat that! Aww I miss you and Celz heaps, and haven’t had the pleasure of meeting your little people! Hope Emma and Josh are both well and I promise to visit next time in Brisbane. Will email you re: NY and LA. x

  12. What it was lacking that really should have shaped the movie is its character/story. I was expecting a complex and believable plot, but was left with a movie with mostly strong visuals. What most sci-fi lovers desire is mind-bending philosophies, fantasy and exploration and limitations of our or outer species. If it was not for this factor, I would give this a 9.5 vote.

  13. Tyson: why thank you for the movie review 😉

  14. Great article on Avatar.. I just read the Avatar Movie Review over at MVP and they seemed to love it, so ill be seeing it this weekend.

  15. I love the Avatar 3D movie, especially the story line, not solely it brings a very new feelings however eye opening thoughts of humanity. I heard the New Avatar 2 is comming soon, cannot wait to see it again…!

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