I can tell you now, Groupon is going to be the end of me. What’s Groupon you ask? Really? Where have you been?
Groupon is a new(ish) sales concept, probably made up by some crazy old dude sitting in his basement, swigging a bottle of ‘Beam and smoking some pack of yellowed cigarettes he stashed away for a rainy day, way back in 1962. Whoever he is, he is now a rich motherfucker, because the concept of Groupon has taken off… mainly due to suckers like myself.
Groupon works on the premise that each day they present you with a new deal. It’s usually some fandangle deal offering you upwards of 80% off some meal or shopping or laser-liposuction (no joke) and if enough people sign up, “The Deal Is On!” and you get the discount. If not enough people sign up then well, I’m guessing the deal isn’t on. The catch is that you only have 24 hours to decide if you’re in. Once the time’s up, the deal is closed and we move on to the next deal.
The way this shit works its magic on me is that I’m what the Hokkien folk of the world call… kiasu. I don’t ever like to lose, regardless of whether it’s competitive sports, Pictionary, an argument with Panu or even that stupid beach holiday competition where I lost to a fat guy in a mankini (but really, out of all those, I loathe losing at Pictionary). Groupon isn’t even a goddamn competition and I still don’t like to lose.
So due to this slight character flaw of mine, I get a little trigger happy when I see my daily (daily! They do this to me daily!) Groupon email. And a few weeks ago, when an offer came through for UNLIMITED (unlimited! Like, I can go All Day Every Day) Bootcamp sessions for £20 (£20! That’s CHEAP!) I signed up.
Idiot.
(Ok at this point I should point out that yes, while it’s true that even though I’ve paid £20 I don’t actually have to go, I should also let you know that while I am kiasu, I am also very very very stingy. It’s the Chinese in me. I ain’t wastin’ my £20.)
I went for my first session of Bootcamp on Thursday last week and what can I say? I contemplated feigning injury 10 minutes in because THEY MADE US SPRINT ONE KILOMETER as warm up. I can only sprint 50 meters, motherfucker, and that’s on a good day.
Our trainer is a cold hard bitch, wrapped inside the body of a gorgeous, ever so lovely, ever so soft spoken lady that even when she tells you to push through your pain, somehow it kind of sounds like she’s asking you to please have a seat and here, here’s a big slice of Victorian sponge to help you through your pain. So you just do it, because she’s so goddamn nice.
On Friday last week, I could not walk.
On Tuesday this week, I could walk again. I considered going to another session but it rained! Hallelujah!
Last night, I actually went again.
I came home battered and bruised, hungry, and totally deserving of more than just grapes for dessert. So I started to potter around in the kitchen and decided to make use of the Le Creuset ramekins I got as a prize for turning 31. I didn’t have many supplies so I couldn’t get up to much mischief (oh could I go to the store? Sure I could. Did I want to? Hell no.) but…
I had cream… tick
I had sugar… tick
I had eggs… tick (ok they may be Panu’s eggs I’m sorry, baby!)
I even had a lime! yay!
Welcome to lime pot de crèmes a la Karen of Citrus and Candy… (grrr mine as not as pretty as hers… I don’t like to lose at this either but I seem to do it often).
| Lime pot de crèmes |
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| 250mL single/pouring cream (about 35% fat content) 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 4 egg yolks 70grams castor sugar zest and juice of 1 lime (about 40mL) |
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| Makes 2 or 4, depending on size of ramekin. |
Well Catty, I haven’t booked the bootcamp but bought the yoga and the folding shoes and the massage and the facial and the voucher for some crappy restaurants and and and. and I will now take myself off the groupon mailing list before I start buying teeth whitening and laser hair removal. or a boot camp!
I read a survey that the British were the world leaders in rewarding exercise with a treat. I’ve been to the gym, so I can have a pizza, with extra toppings, and garlic bread, and a bottle of wine. And just to finish I’ll have ice cream too.
In all seriousness the pots look lovely. And containing fruit they are god for you too!
Good luck removing yourself from the Groupon mailing list. I have now tried twice and failed.
haha catty… I can’t believe you went to bootcamp not once but twice? well the lime pots look like a good reward. sounds delicious!
LOL I see what you mean by the ‘Groupon’ thing (or in our case it’s damn Spreets). I’ve already fallen underneath its spell… but for like beauty stuff, not bootcamp! You’re hardcore! Go you!
I hope the lime pot de cremes were sweet enough to soothe your battered body. xx
1km for a warmup? That’s crazy! 😮
HungryinLondon: LOL it’s addictive isn’t it??? I’m glad I’m not the only crazy person buying all sorts of weird stuff on Groupon 😀
Helen: Well, it’s maths isn’t it? Burn calories, eat calories! Makes perfect sense to me! I haven’t even tried unsubscribing yet. Don’t think I could handle the withdrawal symptoms 🙁
jenny: I know, right? Sucker for punishment (and Groupon)…
Karen: The lime pot the cremes were purrrrfect thanks so much for the recipe! I know I’m insane. I should be using it to buy more discounts off food stuff!
Lorraine: I shit you not. I wanted to die. I think the last 500m was more a painful jog than anything resembling a sprint.
Oh man I’m so glad I didn’t buy the bootcamp offer… there is no way that I could have sprinted for 1km. And you know what – everyone has a little bit of kiasu in them, so it’s all good. 😀
There’s something perverse about boot camp with a “gorgeous, ever so lovely, ever so soft spoken lady”, surely it should be with a scary and incomprehensible American drill sergeant. I have made a note to stay away from Groupon, boot camps and 1km sprints… seriously – for a warm up! D’you think it’s alright to skip the punishment and go straight the treat, which looks tres tasty?
OMG I love Groupon!! And over here they have other ones too like Tippr, Buywithme, LivingSocial and one just for food – Blackboard Eats. I’ve signed up for all kinds of stuff too Cat and I have a friend that signs me up for stuff as well! She bought me a month of unlimited Hot Yoga and we both went and almost passed out. Success! Sike.
Su-yin: I don’t think ANYONE can sprint for 1km! But just trying hurts hehehe… yes, everyone is a little kiasu 😉
The Grubworm: Seriously, she is so cute and sweet that you wouldn’t ever say no to her, even if she asks you to do 50 push ups back to back with 50 sit ups and squat jumps. It’s insane. It’s part of the evil plan!!
The First Lady: It’s dangerous! Like that Rue La La thing you made me sign up to! I just delete them without looking now lol… bad influence!!
Uhhh, signed up for groupon now – your fault!
Lime pots, yes please! Boot camp, no thanks.
Anyway, why pay for exercise when you can have your own “free” weight training set in a few years? My 5kg dumbbell cries and the 18kg one throws tantrums. At the end of the day I have no bulging muscles but a buggered back. In other words, exercise is bad for you! 😛
Okay, so can I just say: WHAT DID I TELL YOU. You signing up for Bootcamp = insaaaaaane. But y’know what, eventually you’ll be thankful that you did it. And in the meantime you can eat yummy little desserts like these. Y’know. To regain your strength.
😉
Jax x
Michelle: LOL yes well when I get to having my own free weight training I will be sure to stop bootcamp (if I haven’t already DIED from bootcamp). I believe the free weight training includes cardio once they start walking 🙂
Jackie: DEFINITELY. Sugar helps regain strength! Genius!
Ha ha ha, I’m loving you treating yourself to these lime pots after putting yourself through that hell (she says, about to rejoin the gym). I have an 18kg dumbbell of my own and yes I can vouch it includes cardio but sadly also a likelihood of consoling yourself with chocolate when they drive you round the twist.
Groupon sounds exactly like Keynoir but whereas I’ve never heard anyone else other than those people who were with me at the Blogger’s event mention Keynoir I have seen references to Groupon all over the place. I might sign up. Hopefully they’ll have better deals than Keynoir do!